The Dengie Hundred

Banner Heading

Welcome to the ancient Hundred in Eastern Essex

The Law as written by Dengie Dog

Dengie Dog

Dengie Dog is a handsome dog living in the Dengie 100 where he is in control of a family of humans.

To help us humans understand their dogs he has helpfully established some rules.

Dog Law 1: All swamps, ponds, muddy creaks and puddles are valid places to drink.

Dog Law 2: *Any food left unguarded for more that 10 seconds is mine. It doesn't matter if it is still on the stove or not!

Dog Law 3: If you leave the house to put the rubbish out, I *will* greet you the same as if you have been gone for 4 hours.

Dog Law 4: No matter how asleep you think I am, I *will* hear you open a packet of biscuits (even if you are in a different room).

Dog Law 5: If I have enjoyed my dinner, it is perfectly polite to come and wipe my slobbery chops over you, the sofa and the rug.

Dog Law 6: The sofa is mine. All of it!

Dog Law 7: That smell wasn't me.

Dog Law 8: Never trust cats…. or vacuum cleaners. Ever!

Dog Law 9: During walkies - if it moves, chase it. If it doesn't, pee up it.

Dog Law 10: Don't play with cats. You don't know where they've been.

Dog Law11: Swamps are the 'proper' place to have a bath. Soap is the work of the devil.

Dog Law 12: All encounters with rotting fish, crabs or birds must be rolled in (and fox poo of course).

 

Dengie Dog Consequences of Dog Law 11

 

You can enjoy the adventures of Dengie Dog on twitter by following @dengiedog